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7/30/2018 0 Comments

Hate Is Learned!

Did you know hate is a LEARNED condition?
Human beings weren't born to hate!

We need to be better role models to our kids because they see how others hate on each other and think it's okay.

Hate is NOT okay!

Where would a 7-year old kid get the idea to hate a person who is different than them?? From their surroundings, parents, family members, friends, etc. The chain of hate needs to be broken and it's up to us as adults to start showing kindness and love, no matter the race, creed, sexual orientation, handicaps... we are ALL human.

Love is what we were born to do. Let's not deny who we really are deep down and learn to love again... love others and ourselves.
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6/18/2018 0 Comments

Tips On Cyberbullying

What is Cyberbullying?

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What is cyberbullying? In simplest terms, cyberbullying is digital abuse that is done deliberately, repeatedly, and with intention to harm. This form is easier for the bully because they can hide behind a computer and not face their victim.

What do you do if you're being cyberbullied?

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Here are a few tips from StompOUTBullying.org, StopBullying.gov and Mamma Z, to help anyone out there who is a victim of cyberbullying.

TELL YOUR PARENTS
AND
NEVER RESPOND!!!

Make printouts of all the online abuse and give those to your parents, school and police, if necessary.
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Delete AND block the bully!

CUT ALL TIES!!!

Report the online bullying!!! Report to social media, law enforcement and schools… Many state schools are required to address cyberbullying in their anti-bullying policies.

Stand Up to Cyberbullying!

If you see someone being an online bully, call them out and tell them to stop. Report them if necessary. No one should feel like they can't get away or don't have a safe place to go. Cyberbullying is so easy for bullies to hurt others outside of school; kids can't get away from the abuse. Cutting the cord would be an impossible feat so let's do our part to make the Internet a safer place for all.
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National Suicide Prevention LifeLine
Call 1-800-273-8255
 
GLBT Youth National TalkLine
1-800-246-PRIDE

https://www.stopbullying.gov/

http://stompoutbullying.org/
HELPCHAT LINE

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6/11/2018 0 Comments

Tips On Bullying

What do you do if you're being bullied or
see someone being bullied?

Here are a few tips from StompOUTBullying.org, StopBullying.gov and Mamma Z, to help anyone out there who is a victim of bullying.
Anti-bullying zombie children's books

Be sure to Speak Up! If you feel safe AND confident enough to confront the bully yourself, be calm and don't bully them back. Ask them to stop and tell them they're not being cool. Sometimes laughing it off neutralizes the situation and takes the wind out of their sails.

Tell an adult you TRUST. Parents, teachers, coaches, school counselor are a great start but if you're having troubles on getting their help, keep looking for someone who will until the problem is resolved.
Don't Give Up!

anti-bullying zombie children's books

Avoid the bully's hangouts or where the bullying happens. If it's at school or somewhere you HAVE to be, then be around other friends or an adult.

anti-bullying zombie children's books

Learn self defense to help build confidence. We will never condone violence but knowing you have the power to defend yourself is a great start to growing your confidence. We all know bullies are cowards! So when they SEE your confidence, they will more than likely back down.


Be a friend to someone who is bullied. Just showing you care means the world to them. Be understandable, supportive, and inclusive with activities.
Be a light in someone's life!

anti-bullying zombie children's books

National Suicide Prevention LifeLine
Call 1-800-273-8255
 
GLBT Youth National TalkLine
1-800-246-PRIDE

https://www.stopbullying.gov/

http://stompoutbullying.org/
HELPCHAT LINE

anti-bullying zombie children's books
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6/4/2018 0 Comments

Acceptance vs Tolerance Taught in Schools

Mamma Z gives her thoughts on the difference between the terms Acceptance and Tolerance being used in schools as bully-prevention programs:

"Tolerance in schools" or "Zero-Tolerance campaigns" don't seem to have a very positive connotation attached. Of course, the WAY it's being taught is different and I'm not condemning that at all. However, I think using the term Acceptance would be more beneficial to young children rather than Tolerance because it's positive and not something they're forced to do.

When you really think about the meaning of the words and their synonyms, you'll be able to understand their differences and see why I think the term Tolerance should be changed. Simply put, Acceptance has more positive meanings behind it such as 'welcome', 'favorable', 'receptive', 'receiving'. To tolerate something or someone means to endure, put up with, stomach, deal with... is that what we want to teach our kids?

In my opinion, when anyone is forced to deal with something or someone, there's going to be some resentment attached. If we taught Acceptance early on and on a daily basis, children will learn to be welcoming of other people's differences and not feel like they HAVE to put up with them.

Watch the video and let us know your thoughts in the comments! And don't forget to SUBSCRIBE!

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5/14/2018 0 Comments

I Stood Up to My Bullies... U Can 2!

Part 1

During an intimate discussion with Mamma Z, she talks about her childhood bullies and what she did to overcome them. She wanted others to know about her stories to
A. let people know they're not alone
B. explain some resolution do's and don'ts
C. explain to people how bullying can stick with you, even years later
And
D. Confidence is everything.
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Many people think that most bullying is "teasing" or that it's a show of affection... that mentality needs to stop immediately. That's just another way to brush severe underlying issues under the rug and encourage victim blaming and shaming. Click here to read about the effects of bullying.

Mamma Z's goal is to encourage bullied victims to talk about their stories. No more being quiet. The more we talk, the more people listen, the more they learn that bullying is NOT okay.
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What's your story? What did you do to overcome your bullies? Did you have someone you could trust to talk with? We'd love to hear your story in the comments. No more silence.

This video is split up in TWO parts so be sure to watch for the conclusion video!
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4/23/2018 0 Comments

Choose Your Words Wisely DEMO!

In this episode, Mamma Z shows the viewers at home her Choose Your Words Wisely demonstration used in her anti-bullying classroom presentations.
This visual demonstration shows children the effects of bad words said to others and once it's been said, it cannot be taken back. Many people don't think before they speak and their words can mean life or death to someone struggling. So choose your words wisely and help lift someone up!

Our goal is to show children words DO hurt. We all must choose our words wisely because we don't know what other people are going through. We are all in this together so let's spread kindness to others and keep lifting each other up!
~Mamma Z

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0 Comments

12/22/2017 1 Comment

My kid is the bully...What do I do?

Your Kid Is a Bully

​Parent's Worst Realization....

As a parent, you take special pride in your children, after all, they are your offspring. They are an extension of yourself in many ways, so anything they do or not do is a direct reflection of you as a parent in the eyes of society. When your kid is a model of perfection, it brings a prideful tear to your eye..
BUT... What happens when you get the news...
YOUR kid is the school bully. 

**screeching halt** **record scratch** **crickets chirp**

This can be a difficult pill to swallow right away. But, NO NOT WORRY! This is something that you can easily address and give them the ​proper guidance on how to correct the behavior and show them why it's important that we make sure everyone is treated equally and respectfully

​Common Misconception...

Bully Free

​First Thing: Your Kid is NOT Evil

It is a common misconception that if a kid is a bully, that they may be "evil" or just mean at heart. This is not always the case! Some kids have a hard time expressing themselves, or feel as though they cannot be heard, so they take their aggression out in other ways.
Pull them aside and tell them they are OK! A kid could be very upset about something at school and has not come forward with it, or maybe they feel singled out in some way.
So, always make sure when you talk to them about this, not to make them feel even more singled out or afraid. You want to open the discussion of bullying with them where they feel safe and can open up about what is going on.


​Get Involved with the School


This one may be tricky because of guidelines that schools have in place. But, the best thing you can do is keep in constant communication with them. Things to look for include:
  • Behavioral Changes
  • Other Children's interactions with them
  • Positive/Negative attitude change
The good news is when it's caught early on and handled correctly, your kid can learn to change their ways of bullying and head on a new path. Kids are sponges and they soak in the environment around them. Keep it positive!
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Schools should be a Bully-Free Zone


​Help Them to Understand

Do your children know the effects of bullying? When I ask this question, parents always say, "Yeah, they know. We have talked about it before!" 

I'll stop most of them right there and clarify what I mean by the question. Just because you "told" them or "talked to them" about bullying, does not mean they fully UNDERSTAND what bullying is and why it can be harmful to other children. Because, if they DID fully understand it, they would not be doing it. 

Tell them about the 4 types of bullying:
  • Physical
  • Emotional
  • Cyber
  • Social
Although we will not be getting into these 4 specifically here, it is important to talk to them about each one and their individual effects. There is a chance they did not understand that what they were doing was actually bullying. This could be a great opportunity to bring up bullying to them.
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Just because they were bullied, doesn't make it right to bully others


Don't Allow Them to Play the Victim Card


Playing the victim is the easiest way out for bullies. It makes them feel that how they reacted in the situation was completely justified. It also communicates an opinion that they are not responsible for their actions.

Nip It In the Bud
Allowing victim-thinking to take hold in your kids will leave them open to a barrage of problems going forward in life. They’ll find it hard to change and grow. Kids who play the victim card get accustomed to that way of thinking and end up not living a well productive and beneficial lifestyle.

​Let them know that it is not okay to bully even if they themselves have suffered at the hands of bullies before.

Bully
Why does your kid bully?

​Show Them That They Always Have A Choice

Bullying doesn’t happen because the victim encouraged it. The bullies need to know this! It is your duty and obligation as a parent to help them realize that the choice they made was wrong and ended up hurting the true victim.
​

Even in group and peer pressure scenarios, the choice is theirs to make. Tell them it is better to dissociate from such groups that make you do “bad things” to others than be part of it. That IS a choice they do have.

​Parent's have their own form of justice


Bully Punishment

​Make Sure that the Punishment Fits the Crime

Sometimes your kid bullies out of habit and cannot help it. In those cases, the damage done needs to be reversed and they need to be punished for the bullying that they’ve done. This acts as a negative reinforcement and will help them let go of the behavior of bullies to adopt a better approach to dealing with problems.

For Example: If you find that they write hurtful comments a gaming forum, maybe the best way to deal with this is to take away their gaming privileges for the week, but make sure theyunderstand WHY you did this.

​You aren't trying to be the "mean" parent...but a parent that wants to raise someone who is respectful and respected.


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​Teach Them How They Can Make It better

Maybe the reason why your kid took the approach that most bullies do is that they do not fully understand the importance of empathy. Developing this trait is extremely important in our society. Next time your kid bullies someone and you have a talk with them, tell them how they made the victim feel. This will encourage them to develop empathy for others. Sometimes a simple "sorry" may​ not be enough. You may have to take it a step further:
  • Write out an apology letter to the victim
  • Give the victim a peace offering gift

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Zombie Squirts Bullying

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Mamma Z

Mamma Z is the Author and Illustrator of the Children's Book Series "Zombie Squirts."
​She is on a mission to eliminate bullying!

1 Comment

12/16/2017 0 Comments

How can you Help your kid Take a Stand Against Bullying?

Here’s how you can help your kid take a stand against bullying.

We all know what it was like being a kid. Managing play and homework along with classes at school. Many of us that were unfortunate enough to be bullied in school or after may remember that very well. What if your kid is going through the same? It can get worse if you do not take a stand against bullying, even if your child won’t.
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Why is Standing up Important?

It isn't a surprise to find out that bullying has become almost an epidemic in today's world. It has become so much easier to become a bully because of the ease of access to people's weaknesses or differences through social media.

If you read this and you do not fully understand the effects of bullying you might want to check out those first, so that way you have a fully grasp on why this topic of Taking a Stand Against Bullying is so important.


I want to take the time to break down a few things you should keep in mind when trying to stand up to bullying and the importance of each one. Being a bystander and just "accepting" that bullying is "normal" is not going to cut it, and you should know that being a bystander can be just as harmful as being the bully themselves...it is your and our responsibly to inform our kids about the different Types Of Bullying and how we can Take a Stand!

Group Up

It is important that your kid understands the environment that they are in and are well prepared for bullying. One of the best things that you can do is to explain to them why it is important to have a group of friends and what it does to prevent bullying.

Motivate them to make the right friends in school and travel in that group especially when going through “bully territory.” Work on them collaboratively to develop how they can make the right friends. This is a good way to take a stand against bullying.

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Stronger Voices

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Watch Lion King with them once. Get to the part where Simba tries to roar as a cub in front of the three hyenas. After that scene is done, pause the movie and have a short discussion to explain to them how those hyenas represented bullies and what a strong voice can do and that violence isn’t the answer. Also assure them that if things get out of hand, adults that you know are always there to help.
When your kids take a stand against bullying it usually involves standing up for themselves and being assertive. Bullies will back off when your kid is assertive and shows that he is not the easy target that they are searching for. Help them practice their “roar” and when it really matters, they’ll be able to do it in front of those bullies.

Ditch the Phone to be Aware

Awareness of the surroundings is an important part of evading a potential bullying situation. Tell them to lose their phones when walking in and around school, home or elsewhere. Do they see a rough group of boys around the school? Is the guy in the car near the Carl’s Jr. keeping an eye on them? Is there a car near the bus stop that shouldn’t be there?
If the kids know that have to steer clear from these areas when they can, and trust that uneasy feeling in their stomach, they can avoid bullies as well as potential mugging or assault attempts in their adult life.

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Know When to Back Out

Lastly, tell them that they can take a stand against bullying when they step away from a bad situation going worse. They often don’t realize that stepping away from a fight is the right thing to do most of the times. They think it is cowardice to turn away, so remind them that it takes a lot of courage just to step out of a bullying situation when it’s becoming worse.

The Anti- Bullying - Zombie Squirts books are a fun way  to open up the conversation of bullying with your child!
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0 Comments

12/15/2017 0 Comments

The 4 Types of Bullying

There are Many Types of Bullying

Forms of Bullying

Bullying isn't just a blanket term...

The term "bullying" can wear many different hats. It isn't just a blanket statement that covers every aspect of the word. There are multiple forms of Bullying and different levels that they can each be taken to.
However, it works very simply in our minds if we can group things together to gain a much better understanding about it.
So, I have taken the liberty to break down the different types of Bullying into simple-to-understand bullet points that list them into four categories:
  1. Physical
  2. Emotional
  3. Cyber
  4. Social
Anti Bullying
Keep in mind we will not being going into the individual effects each of these have on the victim, but just explaining what they are so you can better see these things happening around you in a clearer light.
Sometimes once you can identify the monster for exactly what it is and break it apart piece by piece, that is when you are able to learn its weaknesses and hopefully eliminate it
"It's important to stand up to all forms of bullying, and it's even more important for those who are around you to be just as courageous and stand with you!" — Normani Kordei

​Social Bullying

This one can be hard to pin point...

Social bullying is sort of a hard one to identify. It really is unlike all the other forms of bullying. As you dive into the other forms, your will find that the other 3 are mainly directed towards someone right to them specifically.
With social bullying, it is technically an act that involves talking petty behind someone's back. This could be through:
  • Hurtful Rumors
  • Awful Jokes about the victim to other people
  • Laughing at the Victims Expense
  • Getting Others Involved to Bash or Bad Mouth the Victim
When this form of bullying is presented, it may be easier to overlook due to the non-confrontational aspect. However, it needs to be taken just as serious as any other form of bullying and stopped immediately. This type of behavior should never be acceptable because once it begins, it is a difficult monster to stop.
Social bullying is like a gateway bullying system. They try it and get away with it, or are never held accountable for their actions. This can lead to a life-long pattern of terrible behaviors that could get others or even themselves hurt.
Social Bullying
"Not everyone has been a bully or the victim of bullies, but everyone has seen bullying, and seeing it, has responded to it by joining in or objecting, by laughing or keeping silent, by feeling disgusted or feeling interested."
— Octavia E. Butler

Cyber Bullying

Cyber Bullying is Serious

Cyber bullying has really taken force in the last few years. Ever since the ability to contact anything at virtually anytime for any reason, people have found a way to take an amazing form of technology and use it for evil. Cyber-bullying can be broken into two main categories:
  1. Hardware
  2. Software

Hardware

Hardware is anything physically tangible to a human being. There are multiple ways that bullying has been channeled through a form of hardware. Some examples are:
  • Computer
  • Tablets
  • Smart phones
Cyber Bullying

Software​

Cyber Bullying
Of course, being able to use a smart phone, tablet or computer is one thing, but how are people most likely connected through these devices? That's right, through the Software that enables direct communication from one person/party to another. Some examples are
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Email
  • Instant messaging
There has been a small debate on whether or not cyber-bullying really is a form of true "bullying" or not. When it comes right down to it, if you are involved in something that is actively meant to diminish, hurt or cause physical/mental damage to another human being... You are a bully. It does not matter how or where you perform the action.

Period.     End of story

Verbal Bullying

Words carry weight...

Verbal bullying is by far the most common form of bullying that presents itself. This is such a subtle way of bullying that at the moment may seem harmless, but it is far from it
Verbal bullying is when something is spoken out towards a victim by the bully themselves. The main direction the bully is shooting for is to try and cut down the victim using words.

We have all heard the phrase "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."
This is a nice phrase used to show kids and adults that we don't need to take what other people say about us to heart.



Verbal Bullying
Verbal Bullying


It promotes us to take more action for ourselves and not let others get the best of us. But, let's be honest, WORDS DO HURT. In fact, they hurt quite a bit depending on context and the situational instance.

​
Forms of verbal bullying include:
  • Name Calling
  • Teasing
  • Racist Comments
  • General Insults

Get Your hands OFF!

So, last but not least, we get to the end of the Bullying Saga. We have so far discussed three forms of bullying:
  • Social
  • Cyber
  • Verbal
The one that I wanted to save for last is extremely important because it is the one that can get out of hand the quickest, which means it needs to be acted upon 

Physical Bullying

Physical Bullying...the worst one?


Physical Bullying
Physical Bullying is when someone has broken the boundaries of the internet, their social status and even gone further than saying hurtful things to someone. They have now decided that physical violence is the "answer."

Physical Bullying is any of the following, but not limited to:
  • Kicking
  • Hitting
  • Grabbing
  • Pushing
  • Attacks
If you are a victim of bullying and you have had any of these (or others) happen to you... You need to SPEAK UP! If you are a witness to these actions and you aren't sure what you should do, follow these steps. They will get you at least on the right track.
​

Do not brush off these signs of attacks, whether you are a victim or a bystander. Remember, if you do NOTHING to help the victim, you are no better than the bully.

Speak up.

Zombie Squirts are the ONLY Anti-Bullying Zombie Kids "Alive!" These fun characters show the importance of accepting everyone for who they are. These Children's books are a perfect Gift! Get Your Copy TODAY!
Anti Bullying Zombie Squirts
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12/9/2017 2 Comments

Stop Bullying in Schools: Follow these 5 Simple Steps

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​Why Should I Say Anything at All?

We all have seen bullying in the hallways of our schools, both grade school and high school. A lot of the time, it can seem overwhelming to know what actions you need to take when you see something like this.
You may be thinking things like:
  • "If I ignore the problem, maybe it will go away..."
  • "if I say something, maybe they will come after me"
  • "I don't know who I'm suppose to go to, or if anyone will even listen"
It is important to remember that NOT taking action is just as bad as the bullying itself. If you don't take action, who will? Taking these situations seriously and making sure that something is done to prevent it in the future is the most important thing we can do. 

Teaching our children at a young age about the effects of bullying, can help us save thousands of lives per year!

5. Do NOT Ignore it...

If you ignore it, are you any better than the bully?

Ignoring problems and hoping they go away will never end in peace and resolution. You should never assume that any form of bullying is just innocent "teasing".
  • Take this SERIOUSLY...never let it get out of hand.
  • Make sure the student being bullied doesn't feel alone in this situation.
  • Just because you think it may be harmless, doesn't mean the bullied student doesn't feel embarrassed or terrified.
Ignoring the problem and allowing this behavior to continue, is just as bad as being a bully yourself. If you don't stand up for people in need...who will?
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4. Stay Calm and Collected...

Do not let your emotions get away from you...
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Do not let your emotions get away from you...When you witness someone being bullied it can be an emotional roller coaster. You may want to react right away in a fit of fury. Anger is a natural human emotion, but it is best to remain calm and make sure that you do not add fuel to the fire.
  • Take a deep breath.
  • Assess the situation.
  • Do not engage in the negativity, just be calm and assertive and stop the situation as quickly as possible

3. Make Mental Notes About the Situation...

Do not overlook all the details...
In a heated moment of bullying, it can be easy to lose sight of the important details of the situation. Make sure that after you follow step 4 of "remain calm and collected", you take a look at your surroundings.
  • When did it take place?
  • Who was there?
  • Who was the Bully?
  • Who was the Victim?
  • What time of day was it?
All of these things are important in order to make sure you can explain every detail later on. The worst thing you can do in this situation is forget the important details and the "when, where, and whys" of it happening. If you forget all of these details, later on your input will become invalid and you will not be a very trusted form of information.
So, make sure that you pay close attention and keep mental notes about everything going on. This information will become very important later on

2. Talk to the Victim About It

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Ask these simple questions to get the whole story...
Once you have taken in all of the surroundings of the situation, make sure you speak to the victim about what happened.
Some questions that you should ask him/her:
  1. Have you been bullied by this person before?
  2. If yes, how often does this happen?
  3. Have you ever talked to anyone about it?
  4. What is the worst thing they have done?
Asking some of these simple questions and getting the answers is the best thing you can do.
If the student tells you that they have spoken up about the situation before, but nothing proactive has been done to fix it, then you will have to make sure you speak passionately about it in the next step
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​1. Tell Someone!

The final step in the process...
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Now that you have followed the other 4 steps it is time to tell someone. Make sure you get a teacher, vice principal, superintendent or parent involved.
You have already decided that you were not going to ignore the problem, you are calm and collected, you have gathered all the mental notes you need about the situation and you have talked to the victim and know exactly what he/she is going through.

It is time to take all of this information to somebody with authority. Do not take no for an answer, especially if this is an ongoing thing. This needs to be stopped, and if you don't make it a big deal, nobody else will either. This is not the time to be afraid, it is the time to take actions and make sure you help someone in need. Never let anyone discourage you from helping others, that person's life could be on the line
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Taking the time...

As a parent, teacher or by-stander, it can be overwhelming and difficult to know what to do, but if you follow these 5 steps, you will have the confidence to take action!
Taking the time to care about others and finding something valuable to you is very important. Anytime you can learn something new and educate yourself on the importance of bullying, we are all making one step closer to a more kind and loving world!

​Zombie Squirts are the ONLY Anti-Bullying Zombie Kids "Alive!" These fun characters show the importance of accepting everyone for who they are. These Children's books are a perfect Gift! Get Your Copy TODAY!
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    "Mamma Z"

    Mamma Z is the Author and Illustrator of the Children's Book Series "Zombie Squirts." She is on a mission to eliminate bullying!

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