Parent's Worst Realization....
As a parent, you take special pride in your children, after all, they are your offspring. They are an extension of yourself in many ways, so anything they do or not do is a direct reflection of you as a parent in the eyes of society. When your kid is a model of perfection, it brings a prideful tear to your eye..
BUT... What happens when you get the news...
YOUR kid is the school bully.
**screeching halt** **record scratch** **crickets chirp**
This can be a difficult pill to swallow right away. But, NO NOT WORRY! This is something that you can easily address and give them the proper guidance on how to correct the behavior and show them why it's important that we make sure everyone is treated equally and respectfully
Help Them to Understand
Do your children know the effects of bullying? When I ask this question, parents always say, "Yeah, they know. We have talked about it before!"
I'll stop most of them right there and clarify what I mean by the question. Just because you "told" them or "talked to them" about bullying, does not mean they fully UNDERSTAND what bullying is and why it can be harmful to other children. Because, if they DID fully understand it, they would not be doing it.
Tell them about the 4 types of bullying:
Just because they were bullied, doesn't make it right to bully others
Don't Allow Them to Play the Victim Card
Show Them That They Always Have A Choice
Bullying doesn’t happen because the victim encouraged it. The bullies need to know this! It is your duty and obligation as a parent to help them realize that the choice they made was wrong and ended up hurting the true victim.
Even in group and peer pressure scenarios, the choice is theirs to make. Tell them it is better to dissociate from such groups that make you do “bad things” to others than be part of it. That IS a choice they do have.
Teach Them How They Can Make It better
Maybe the reason why your kid took the approach that most bullies do is that they do not fully understand the importance of empathy. Developing this trait is extremely important in our society. Next time your kid bullies someone and you have a talk with them, tell them how they made the victim feel. This will encourage them to develop empathy for others. Sometimes a simple "sorry" may not be enough. You may have to take it a step further:
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